Most people at some point in their life have repressed their emotions, which will not cause much inconvenience if you resolve them in a healthy way. However, when it happens constantly, it can affect different aspects, which we will talk about later. Remember that although it tends to take a little time and effort, learning to express your feelings is very important to staying healthy.
Why do people hide their feelings? One of the first reasons is not to show weakness, that others judge them and use those feelings against them. Also to avoid getting hurt in relationships, even from a lack of trust. Many from a young age receive the message that their feelings do not matter, with this they learn to hide everything that happens to them and it is likely that over time they do not feel safe to express themselves.
Why shouldn’t you repress your feelings?
Masking all those emotions that are generated on a daily basis can cause several negative effects, both physically and mentally. Although it is a good way to avoid conflict and pain at a certain moment, in the end everything can get out of control and hurt you more than necessary. So if you want to cry, do it.
When you hide what you feel, you only make communication with others unclear and it is more difficult to overcome conflicts. You may start to withdraw from the people who provoke these emotions, so you will be losing relationships that may be valuable. In addition, emotional suppression can become a habit, to the point that it begins to happen unconsciously and you lose contact with your own feelings.
Pretending emotions does not make them disappear, on the contrary, you would be accumulating them. For example, when you suppress your anger it means that you are not addressing it and it will continue to grow. As time goes on, you won’t be able to hold back any longer and it is likely to explode. This would happen to anyone, not necessarily the one who made you angry in the beginning, but it also affects relationships with others and your life in general.
You can get sick
Suppressing emotions causes you to experience an increase in stress levels and without treatment, it tends to stay in the body, which can contribute to serious long-term health problems. These include diabetes, difficulty falling asleep, high blood pressure, and heart disease.
Create tension in relationships
Even if you think that you hide your emotions perfectly, the reality is that those people who know you can tell that things are not right. Insisting that nothing is happening only creates further confusion and frustration in knowing that you are not telling the truth. They are likely to feel hurt by your lack of trust or start to believe that they don’t know you as well as they thought, affecting the strength of any relationship.
How to solve it?
There are some strategies that you can consider, but sometimes it is difficult to be able to overcome it alone. That is why the most advisable thing is to go to a good therapist, who will help you identify the causes and how to address the situation. However, we present some useful ideas that will allow you to feel more comfortable with emotions and make it easier to overcome that need to repress them, by not being able to assist with the doctor.
- Practice mindfulness: It involves being aware of the moment and experiencing things as they happen. That is, being able to recognize and accept feelings as they arise, even if you don’t express them right away. You may think, “I’m very upset right now, but the least I want is to start a fight, so I’ll take a few seconds before explaining why I feel this way.”
- Talk to someone you trust: If you can’t express your emotions in the moment, try talking about them with a friend or family member later, especially if circumstances can’t be changed. Knowing that you can share your discomfort later will allow you to get through the day without worrying too much.
- Keep a journal: This is another good way to help you practice expressing your emotions as they arise. By doing this you can process difficult situations and although it does not have the same impact as dialogue with a person close to you and who builds you trust, it is still of great help.